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- SPACE HERPES! ON THIS SHIP?
Sci-Fi, Adventure, COmedy all rolled up into one excellent, hysterical movie. Robert Urich's finest movie ever, also funniest, about being a space-aged bandit out on a mission to search for the galaxy most precious resource, H2O. A non-stop romp of laughs, action, and yes, space herpes that will make you watch this cult flick over and over. Terrific ending too....more info
- "What happened to 'We rape! We pillage!' ?"
I saw Ice Pirates (1984) on cable in the mid to late 80's, and while I seem to remember thinking at the time the film wasn't all that funny, I recently decided to give it another chance as maybe there were nuances I wasn't fully able to enjoy when I was younger...and you know what? I didn't...I enjoyed it as much as I was ever going to enjoy it back when...it's not that the film is completely horrible as it does have a few funny moments, but for the most part the humor is corny, stupid, and generally lame serving up serving up a heaping pile of sexual innuendos and flatulence jokes, among other things. Co-written and directed by Stewart Raffill, the man behind such films as Mac and Me (1988) and Mannequin: On the Move (1991), the film stars Robert Urich (Turk 182!), Mary Crosby (Tapeheads), and Michael D. Roberts (Knight Rider, Manimal). Also appearing is Anjelica Huston (Prizzi's Honor), ex-pro football star John `Tooz' Matuszak (Caveman, The Goonies), Ron Perlman (Blade II, Hellboy), Jeremy West (Howling VI: The Freaks), John Carradine (The Astro-Zombies), and Bruce Vilanch, the writer responsible for much of the craptastic monologue humor witnessed on the Academy Award shows, at least when Billy Crystal was the host.
After the galactic wars, water has become the galaxy's most valuable commodity only because there's so little of it to be had, most of which is controlled by the evil Templars from the planet Mithra. The Templars have nearly absolute power, but are plagued by a smattering of space-faring pirates who subsist by raiding various Templar convoys and stealing ice (which is how the water is transported). Among these pirates is a group led by Jason (Ulrich), including Roscoe (Roberts), Maida (Huston), and Zeno (Perlman), and, as the film opens, we see them attaching themselves to a Templar freighter, cutting their way through the hull and into...a bathroom featuring a flatulent alien (this is pretty much the extent of the comedy). While making their way through the ship, Jason comes across Princess Karina (Crosby) asleep in some sort of stasis chamber and suggests kidnapping her for a ransom, but is persuaded by the rest of the crew to forgo her over the real prize, which is the ice. Plans go awry as Jason and Roscoe (the rest manage to escape) are captured and sent to Mithra to become spandex-clad eunuch slaves (the `processing' scene is one of the funnier sequences in the film), but are saved by the princess as she wishes them to take her to see a man, believed hiding on a pirate moon, who may have been the last person to see her father whose an explorer, searching for a fabled `lost' planet, one that's rumored to have scads of water. Turns out the Templars, led by the evil Zorn (West), who looks like an uptight Eric Idle, are also searching for this planet and are in hot pursuit of Princess Karina, Jason, and his crew.
Director Raffill will never win any awards for outstanding achievement for Ice Pirates, but it's certainly not the worst film he's ever done...that distinction would result in a three-way tie between the execrable E.T. rip-off Mac and Me (1988), a sequel to a film that should have never been in Mannequin: On the Move (1991), and the Denise Richards/Paul Walker suckfest teen movie Tammy and the T-Rex (1994) aka Let's Cash in on This Whole Jurassic Park/Dinosaur Fad Thing. At the very least, Raffill has made an attempt at redemption with his latest film Three (2004) as it features a few scenes with a topless Kelly Brook, who, incidentally, recently lost her lawsuit against the filmmakers as she was hoping to get the nekkid scenes removed for the DVD release (funny how this wasn't an issue until after her and costar Billy Zane became a couple...I guess Billy doesn't like to share)...but I digress...the material overall is pretty juvenile, but at least they were able to rope some very capable actors into the film, many of which I'm sure are probably still feeling the detrimental effects this movie surely had on their careers subsequent to its release, especially the very attractive Mary Crosby (daughter of Bing) and Michael D. Roberts, but hey, what the heck do I know? I'm just one person with an opinion. And then there's Anjelica Huston...I had forgotten she was in this film in a role of the Xena-like, sapphic, leather clad pirate warrior Maida always cutting men's heads off, and a little surprised as her more memorable roles stem from films like Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989), The Grifters (1990), and The Royal Tenenbaums (2001), but then I remembered she also appeared in Michael Jackson's 18 minute vanity project titled Captain EO (1986) he and Francis Ford Coppola made for Disney. Oh, and as far as John Carradine, he's in the film for all of about 2 minutes as the character of Supreme Commander in a scene that appeared to have absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the film other than the fact it was in the script. The most annoying element for me would have to be that of Bruce Vilanch, whom I don't despise because of his sexual preferences, but for the fact that he's just not funny. He plays some effeminate ruler of a world and his elite guard consists of a group of sexy weapon- wielding woman in leather bikinis (what a waste). The story itself is slow as the action sequences are far and few between. The production values are pretty decent, indication someone dropped a little coin on this film (or borrowed from other, already made sci-fi films), but despite their efforts, one will notice they couldn't keep the cheapness out completely...for example, near the beginning as Jason and his pirates are entering the ice hold of the Templar ship...we see a guard running to meet them, climbing down an aluminum latter propped up in the scene, looking much like one someone could buy at the local hardware store.
The wide screen anamorphic (1.85:1) picture on this DVD will be a blessing to many fans of this cult favorite, as now they can ditch their worn VHS copies for this very excellent looking transfer. The Dolby Digital 1.0 comes through very clean and clear. The only special feature available is a theatrical trailer, but it could have worse...there could have been a commentary track by Vilanch.
Keep your eye out for the scene with the pimpbot...
- Chuckles from the Eighties
While this comedy is not a gut buster, it provides some cheap, low brow laughs similar to Space Balls. Only it's water that is in short supply rather than air....more info
- Thank God For No Rape And Pillaging ?
I Saw The Movie Back In The 1980'S And I Thought The Movie Was Awesome, Hillarious And Creative For The Most Part! It Was A Good Movie To Make When Urich And The Cast Had To Avoid Filming With The Space Herpie's. It Bring's Back Good Memorie's While Being A Younster Watching It With My Family Thinking If The There Really Could Be Space Herpie's? Chad Dueling....more info
- As I remember it...
I remember seeing this movie in the theatre when I would have been about 9 years old. I absolutely loved the movie then... and I absolutely love it now as a 31 year old...
The movie "Ice Pirates" is certainly no award winner, but it is a great parody on the sci-fi genre. Less slapstick than Spaceballs, but plenty of cheesy effects, sight gags, and toilet humor.
I thought the acting was very solid. The plot was good, but a little confusing at times. What happened to all the water?
I knew what to expect when I bought this movie on DVD, which is an entertaining sci-fi parody, and not a serious sci-fi movie with ambitions to be some sort of new Star Wars.
If you don't take yourself too seriously, this is an average comedy, which is exactly what I think it was supposed to be....more info
- Space Pirates Thirst For Treasure
"The Ice Pirates" is a 1984 sci-fi film, not exactly a comedy but it does have several silly moments in it. It's got great 1980s effects and robots, I thought, but it's not the best science fiction in the world.
The film is set in a part of the galaxy where there is a major water shortage. Water is so valuable, it is frozen as ice and used as currency, and so rare that even a spit shine of the shoes is hard to get, cause of the saliva involved. There are "Ice Pirates" too, guys and girls who travel the galaxy, using both guns and swords to get their way. The Ice Pirates in this film have many adventures. They avoid a conveyor belt of castration, they speed around on solar powered vehicles, they participate in time warfare (where a zap will age you one day), get roughed by amazon-like women on unicorns, and avoid a horrible leech-like alien known as "space herpes".
There are some interesting and funny moments in the film, but only a few of them. I didn't really feel too connected to the characters or their motivations, and it was a little bit crude at times. I hadn't really heard of this film until I saw it in a DVD store, though I can see how it's been influential. The Polymorph in Red Dwarf (a TV series made several years after this fim) has a form that looks very simliar to the "space herpes" alien in this movie, for instance.
If you're a fan of 1980s special effects it's worth a look, but if you're after a sci-fi comedy try "Spaceballs" or "Red Dwarf" instead....more info
- Either you like the movie or you don't
It's a silly SciFi movie which can be fun to watch about once a year or so....more info
- A terrible disappointment
I have liked Robert Urich ever since I saw him in Vegas. I also liked him in Spenser For Hire and a couple of other movies that I have watched him in over the years. He was a talented actor. Not to mention easy on the eyes, as well. :)
This movie was WAY beneath him and his skills. What we watched of it, about 10 or 15 minutes, or so, was sooo slow and boring. It was pathetic. It wasn't funny. I do not even think that it even tried to be a comedy.
- classic comedy
yeah, its cheesy its silly, but what it does it does well, at times raising the simple fart joke to level of high comedy....more info
- Take one gem and roll it into another
This movie was done during the height of the sci-fi field, when every single movie maker was cranking out whatever far-off adventure they could come up with. I saw this movie not too long after watching "Battle Beyond The Stars", and the most hilarious thing I noticed was the "recycled special effects"!
Seriously....watch BBTS, and then watch Ice Pirates right after it. You'll be amazed how all the ships, space battles, and even aliens tend to look EXACTLY the same as in BBTS!
It does go to show that you can take some of the same stock and make a completely different movie out of it! Definitely one to add to the list of the great 80's sci-fi flicks!...more info
- Ice Pirates leave a warm feeling!
What a wonderful piece of sci-fi fun! I always loved this picture since the first time I saw it WAAAYYY back in '84. I have to admit, it's not for everybody. You really have to be in a class of science fiction fans who also enjoy movies like Sleeper or tv shows like Red Dwarf. My only regret about Ice Pirates was that the director didn't have a larger budget--then again... Urich, Roberts and Huston (The Space Samurai Chick!) really steal the show--check out the gut-funny scene when Ulrich and Roberts were about to lose their "manhood". Hilarious!! The story is ludicrous in itself, water has become more valuable than gold or silver. I always found it funny that these people have the ability of interstellar travel but they can't produce water. I give the movie four stars--even though it loooks really bad on tv--in anyevent, Ice Pirates makes me wish filmmakers would produce more sci-fi satires. Long Live Jason and his Ice Pirates!...more info
- Cheesey Goodness
I had to pick this one up. So what if I loved it as a child, it's still funny and worth the little I paid. The robots crack me up even today and the story line isn't too bad. It's not the greatest movie off all time, but it's a classic to me....more info
- Not as good as I remembered...
It still has funny parts, but it is not as funny as I remembered....more info
- a fun and funny adventure, sci-fi style
no matter what anyone says,this is really a fun and very funny movie and i like it.
robert urich(spencer,s.w.a.t.)stars(with his tight permed hair)with mary crosby(dallas)in this slight,but fun story of pirates of the future where ice and water are the most valueable things in the universe! some great jokes ,some bad ones,and a few great action scenes,with urich always very dashing and crosby always very,very,beautiful. worth a look! enjoy!!!!!...more info
- To DELENDA EST (Reviewer??)
Get over it. It's just a movie.
For everyone else; This is a rare classic that has the right to claim one of the B+ movie list top 10.
It has a unique story, hilarious humor and well known actors. What more could you ask for?...more info
- Ice,Ice Baby
Back when I was in high school,I had a chemistry teacher who bashed this movie for its awfulness. He harped so much on its terribleness that I was intrigued. So,in my perverse curiosity,I rented it. Like my chemistry teacher,I regretted it.
"Ice Pirates" was penned by comedian Bruce Vilanch,more famous for collaborating with Bette Midler. This was not his finest hour. He was trying a take-off on "Star Wars" and fails miserably (just like Vanilla Ice,who tried to have street cred,but failed miserably) It has an interesting premise--pirates smuggling water across the universe.The old "ragtag band of rebels." Robert Urich stars as the lead,Han Solo-like pirate. He escapes being turned into a eunuch on an assembly line,and goes to a desert planet where Anjelica Huston is a leather-clad dominatrix of sorts. There are some gruesome scenes,and then a chase scene that goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on...
That's where I stopped. Its virtual plotlessness kept me from pressing to the end. "Ice Pirates" is one of those bad movies that's so bad it's awful. At least the Star Wars prequels are watchable. They have clunky dialogue,but it makes sense! "Ice Pirates" is the deep freeze of bad movies....more info
- A MUST!
I loved this movie as a kid, and am now getting ready to show it to my child. It is so bad that it is ridiculously good. I can't wait to see it again.
I recommend that every one sees it at least once. You will either love it or hate it. It is just silly fun. It gave me new respect for Robert Ulrich. Now i'm getting all giddy thinking about seeing it again. ...more info
- The precursor to Spaceballs, finally on DVD!
Crisp and clean transfer... excellent quality... and finally in widescreen. The Ice Pirates was ahead of it's time, blending light Sci-Fi with comedy in a manner not seen again until Spaceballs. Aliens, robots, princesses, and time warps abound in this classic... where the humor isn't limited to bland jokes. The sets homage not only the classics of 60's SciFi... but the more serious 80's Science Fiction films. Anyone who considers themselves a SciFi buff should pick this one up, as no collection is complete without it's campy insanity. Sparse on the extras, but beggars can't be choosers. Those who've only seen the craptacular VHS copy owe this film another look on DVD...
For those who haven't seen it... the sum-up of the movie is this. Take Spaceballs, Princess Bride, and Alien... mix in a blender... throw in some 60's SciFi camp and cool robots... and there you go. Given it's been 21 years since the widescreen version has been available to the public... this is a must have Cult classic!...more info
- Enjoyable trashy fun
You won't find anything here but campy cheese of the 80's variety. Very low-budget, the film nonetheless transcends cardboard sets and shoddy costuming to provide good entertainment of the 80's B-movie variety. There's lots of none-too-subtle 80's jokes about herpes and a nasty factory for making lobotomized eunuchs.
Lots of appearances here from stars before they became famous, including a young Robert Urich, a pre-muscles Ron Perlman, Bruce Vilanch (or his head at least), & Anjelica Huston looking rather sexy in her space pirate gear.
- A gaggle of sci-fi cliches masquerading as parody
I couldn't believe when I saw the average rating for this movie was 4 stars. The movie is godawful! I saw this a few times on cable back in the late 1980s, and I thought it was funny at the time. What a difference 20 years makes. I recently bought it for old time's sake, paid 8 bucks for it, and feel dreadfully ripped off. Singularly lame humor, poor acting, mildly interesting idea wasted in a dopey script. I chuckled a little at the robo-pimp and the space herpes, but that was it. My 16 year old son thought it was supremely stupid & continues to berate me for ever buying it.
What is it about so-called "parodies" that they seem to be held to a lower standard than the films they supposedly lampoon? They still need to be original, funny, or at least generally unboring. This isn't. Don't waste 90 minutes of your life, you'll never get it back. (Too bad this dreck is available on DVD, while the more entertaining homage "Battle Beyond the Stars" with Richard Thomas is not.)...more info
- Great Wacky Space Comedy
Robert Urich plays the pirate Jason who gets tangled up with Princess Karina (Mary Crosby) and places "delicate appendages" in serious peril. She tells him of a legend that he father believed to be true. Somewhere in the galaxy is a special planet filled with drinkable water. Lavished scenery, zippy dialogue, galatic hunting, then add time-warping, fast-forward follies with romance and consequences there of. Also stars: Michael D. Roberts, Anjelica Huston, and John Matuszak. Hence, great wacky space comedy...more info
- Ice Pirates with Robert Urich
This is one of my all time favorite comedies. Robert Urich and Mary Crosby do a really god job of pulling off the ridiculous. They are running away from the powers that be in a space ship attempting to find the world of water. They are living in times of synthetic refreshment and super expensive, rare water. This movie takes you through worlds of different people and creature on a trip through a time warp to find the planet of water which will free the people from a tyrannical ruler. Watch it you'll like it!...more info
- Funniest Science Fiction movie ever!
80's Science Fiction movie with humour.
Spaceballs attempted the same thing, but failed miserably. It shows you dont need high tech effects for a good sci fiction flic.
Its a mixture of goofy jokes and rebels against an evil corporate conglomerate type thing. The disco(?) 80s music is great and fits the movie well.
Everything in this movie has character (even the robots!)
I bought an ex-rental of this some time ago and I watch it every now and again for a good laugh....more info
- Before anyone wastes any of their lives watching this...
Let's get the technicalities out of the way up front: the film is presented with a matted 1.85:1 widescreen, which is passable. The picture and colors are dull which is to be expected for 21 year old B-movie. Audio is quite terrible; you get an atrocious mono track. MONO!! And bonus features? Will you settle for just a theatrical trailer? Too bad, 'cause that's all you're getting.
How about the movie itself? Is it worth your time and money? That depends? Do you like to take drugs (like maybe PCP)? If you do then this may be your movie! The film is a disorganized collection of jokes aimed at pre-teen boys who aspire to be professional class clowns, and are destined to earn on the low end of the wage scale. You know the type ;)
Here's the mandatory capsule summary: In the far flung future, the most valuable substance in the universe is water. Hilarity ensues. No seriously...due to all the wars, the galaxy's water supply has almost dried up. The evil Templar Empire controls the remaining water supply, and they periodically have to deal with marauding groups of pirates. Hilarity ensues? No, because Robert Urich plays Jason, one such pirate who hijacks transport ships filled with ice. His crew is a ragtag band including Michael Roberts, Anjelica Huston and Ron Perlman. Anyway, on one of these raids, Jason encounters Princess Karina (Mary Crosby), who is desperately searching for her father, an explorer who disappeared while looking for a mythical planet of water. Jason is captured by the Templars, but he makes a deal with Karina: she'll free him if he'll help her find her father. Hilarity finally ensues.
A poorly conceived, written and executed parody of the (increasingly self-parodying) science fiction genre, the film makes several glaring scientific mistakes. These are not the science fiction/fantasy elements typical of other films of the genre (ie: hyperdrive, transporters and so on). No sir, these are classic examples of bona fide Hollywood scientific illiteracy. And they're real whoppers too, made with bold audacity by the filmmakers. I guess you're supposed to ignore these errors with "suspension of disbelief," but if you have half a brain, you can't.
Am I being too hard on one of the intangible aspects of a film in a genre that has admittedly malleable guidelines? I don't think so, but let's suppose I am. There's so much more here to hammer away at! How about the horrendous costumes, the claustrophobic sets, the yard sale props, the "let's-ask-the-audience-to-pretend-they-see-anything" special effects... The list goes on, but the worst sin committed here is... NONE OF THIS IS FUNNY.
How about the acting? Let's see...this movie killed Mary Crosby and Michael D. Roberts' career, Angelica Huston and Ron Perlman would be hard pressed to ever admit to starring in it, it emboldened Bruce Vilanch to sin again (and again, and again...), and I think it actually killed John Matuszak and Robert Urich. How's that for a body count?
When a stoner-fan of this movie is asked to recall their favorite scenes, they invariably peer back at you through their intoxicated haze of the 1980's and mention the "space herpes," the conveyor belt castration facility, and the "old farts in the time warp" at the movie's climax. Coincidentally, they are also citing some of the film's major problems in both concept and execution.
By now you're thinking "Yeah, but it's a cult movie, man..." (puff, puff) "It's s'posed to be that way, dude...hey I have the munchies..." You could try to use that as an argument, but you'd be wrong. The theory that, because the film contains not one single element meant to be taken seriously thus the whole thing must be funny doesn't apply here. Stewart Raffill isn't a good enough director to take deliberate bad filmmaking and present it in such a way that you're supposed to laugh at it.
All in all, only hard core cult movie fans will enjoy this unflushed toilet of a film. Everyone else will discover very quickly that they've made a horrible mistake and either turn the disc off and return it to the rental store, or desperately try to find some way to return it for a refund or credit. Or you could bypass it altogether, and lead a happier, longer life. You want science fiction comedy? Try Futurama....more info
- Classic 80's cheese.....
This movie made me laugh my a$$ off the whole claw thing is more than enough to want to buy it....more info
- The Ice Pirates
The product was sent quickly and was professional, but the movie wasn't as funny as I remembered it from when I was a kid....more info
- So Bad it's Hysterical
The best way to watch this wacky sci-fi parody is with a group of cheesy movie-loving friends and a case of ice cold, cheap beer. (Ideally, these friends should be people who don't mind "Star Trek" and think Comedy Central's "Mystery Science Theatre 3000" is the best show on television.)
The "special effects" are laughable. The plot is tolerable at best. The performances are, at times, downright horrible. (It's no wonder Ulrich didn't win the Oscar for this one.) But somehow, it all works.
Think "Buck Rogers" (Yes -- in all of it's 1980's glory) meets "Spaceballs" meets "Days of our Lives." Enjoy!...more info
- Destined for cult classic history!
THIS MOVIE NEEDS TO BE ON DVD! It is a great cult classic for fun loving Sci-Fi/Comedy fans. If you liked Spaceballs, Airplane, Buckaroo Bonzi, and The Princess Bride, this movie rolls them into one feature. A good comedy Sci-Fi movie that needs updating to DVD format....more info
- Great 80s nostalgia
I was a teen when I saw this in the theaters. I loved it then and I love it now. Some of the comedy is silly and low-brow, but there are times when the film evokes a hearty belly-laugh (like when Roscoe's afro gets out of hand during the time warp - hilarious!).
The special effects were quite good for their time and the story was very original. The DVD itself, however, is somewhat lackluster. The picture quality is a bit grainy and the only special feature is an overlong and uninteresting trailer, but I guess I'll take what I can get.
Hey, it's fun! What other excuse do you need to see a movie?
- Classic Sci-Fi Comedy
Some-where between star wars and star trek, there lies a distant galaxy where great films reside. Films such as Galaxy Quest, The Last Star Fighter and Ice Pirates. This is a film not to be missed as sci fi comedy is all to hard find. This is a very serious comedy with serious aliens and some very serious battles,that will make you laugh. I have been looking for it on DVD,not vhs....more info
- I can't believe it!
I remember watching this movie on cable years and years ago and I loved it then. I was never able to find it on dvd until now! The humor is great, the story may be just ok for some people, but it's a real treat! And for people who tink it's on the lines of Pirates of Penzance, well, the story only touches that here and there. (PofP with Christopher, Blonde-Curls-whatever-his-name-was, wasn't all that great even when he was popular) I remember the first time I saw it and laughed so hard I fell over. There's only one person I know who has this on DVD and was unwilling to part with it(even for a hefty bribe!). I'm getting in line now! The cast is wonderful and really give it 100%. As cheesy as the sets may look, they didn't seem to be doing this just to have a job, they relly seemed to enjoy themselves (and that makes a BIG difference). Sometimes the humor is crude, and there are a couple of short spots that drag a little bit, but this movie is worth every penny! It's entertaining and engaging.
Buy it! Buy it! Buy it! You'll love it!...more info
- WARNING: This movie can be habit forming!
This movie is for when you are feeling lazy and a bit dazy. It is fun, frolicky, quick paced and space laced with fantasy, light sexual humor, imagination and inovation. Once you view this movie, you will find yourself needing an occasional fix, of a few clips. Then you will catch yourself watching it from start to finish, over and over. ONLY FOR THE YOUNG AT HEART, like me ...... grandmother of nine....more info
- This is supposed to be a comedy, but where's the proof?
This isn't funny. It isn't well directed or scripted. Perhaps it could have been great, if it had had a decent scriptwriter or director, but it didn't, so it turned out mediocre at best. Unfortunately, I believed all the hype on this website and bought a copy of this for my boyfriend and I to watch. I told my boyfriend that according to most of the reviews I'd read, this was going to be a brilliant, hilarious cult classic. But now that we've watched it, he and I both know better. We know it's dreadful, and I can only imagine all the nice things I'm going to have to do for him to make up for my expecting him to sit through this tedious monstrosity. The only highlight for us was a spirited argument he and I got into halfway through the movie about where we'd seen one of the actors in the movie before. I'm pleased to say I won the argument. That was pretty much the only highlight of the movie for me.
In my opinion this is not a 'hilarious cult classic' as others so often describe it. I don't know how drunk I'd have to be to agree with that assessment of the movie, or to find it even a little bit funny, but I suspect I would have to get smashed enough that I'd need a stomach pump afterwards.
If you want to see a genuinly hilarious cult sci-fi classic, pick up a copy of Flash Gordon. That has great actors, great sets, wonderfully campy scripts, brilliant humour, and a soundtrack by Queen. Furthermore, it has stood the test of time and is still great today, unlike 'The Ice Pirates', which has dated REALLY badly.
Better yet, get hold of some 'Red Dwarf' dvds...seriously, Red Dwarf is sci fi humour at its BEST! It's so good, it will spoil you for other sci fi comedies....more info
- If You Liked Mars Attacks! and Buckaroo Banzai ....
This is the movie that killed Mary Crosby's career and nearly derailed Robert Urich's, Angelica Houston's and Ron Perlman's. It's one of those movies - like 1941 and Paint Your Wagon - that everyone knows is a total turkey, except for those who place what they see on the screen above what they read in the reviews. If you liked Mars Attacks! and Buckaroo Banzai, and laughed your ass off at Spaced Invaders and Killer Clowns from Outer Space, you'll love Ice Pirates.
The time is the distant future, where by far the most precious commodity in the galaxy is water. The idea that there were once ten planets whose surface was principally covered by water is considered a myth by most people, as is the story that the last surviving water planet was somehow removed to the unreachable center of the galaxy at the end of the galactic trade wars. The galaxy is ruled by your basic evil emperor (John Carradine) presiding over a trade oligarchy that controls all mining and sale of ice from asteroids and comets.
Robert Urich is Jason, leader of a band of ice pirates that includes Ron Perlman, John Matuzak and Michael D Roberts. Of course, the crew also prominently features the obligatory unbeatable master swordsman and latter-day samurai, but, in a blow for equality, the part is played to perfection by Angelica Houston. In the formulaic plot for outlaw space operas, our heroes attack an ice freighter, are captured, but escape with a princess (Mary Crosby) kidnapped by the evil emperor in tow. They rescue her, thread the perilous path to the center of the universe and the fabled tenth planet, and destroy the evil empire's stranglehold on the people.
Along the way, you are treated to some of film's oddest aliens, god-awful puns and excellent lampoons of space opera icons. It's full of bona fide toilet humor, from the pirates breaking through the hull of the ice freighter into a lavatory whose commode is occupied by a chickenman, to the standard reconditioning for outlaws and other deviants - castration by mechanical chompers, a lobotomy and a blond dye job, then sale as a soprano domestic slave.
Ice Pirates is the illegitimate child of Star Wars and Animal House. The jokes, both verbal and physical, range from the hackneyed to the truly brilliant - and most of both will have you rolling on the floor. It's a an hour-and-a-half of pure unadulterated fun. When I finally get the 6' x 8' screen for our light projector mounted, this will be one of the first movies we watch....more info
- A space comedy on the rocks.
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away (sound familiar), water has become the most precious commodity (this has got to sound familiar) and a small minority control its distribution (what a surprise, just have a heart attack and die from that surprise). A group of ice pirates (water renegades?...wet bandits?...oh wait, that last one's been used) try to discover the route to a fabled unlimited supply of water with a lovely but spoiled (Druish?) princess en tow and a group of idiots...er...despicable villains in pursuit.
This movie had the potential to be a really great comedic parody ("Star Wars," David Lynch's "Dune") but was just not handled correctly. It goes for, I believe the term is, "low brow" humor. It doesn't really succeed in being all that funny which is a shame since it has Angelica Houston, Ron Perlman and Robert Urich, who aren't exactly slackers in the acting department.
Definitely don't pay more than a rental fee to buy it and definitely have a drink straight up....more info
- A pain for the serious science-fiction fan.
A goofy but very funny movie. It gave the otherwise mostly very serious and just about always trying to be epic science-fiction genre a satirical face. And if you look closely there is here and there an underlying thought in the obvious fun, so someone tried to give it all a subtil meaning. I can wholly recommend you joining the fight for freedom and water!...more info
- Laughter In Space
This movie may not be for every audience.... just those with imagination and unique tastes. The "Ice Pirates" is a hilarious look at surviving in the future- but contains many of today's sci-fi "predictions". From Disutopia to space travel this movie contains classic scifi themes. Will water one today be as scarce as we take it for granted these days? The whole essence of the movie relies on the crew's search and trade of H2O. This flick looks at the possibilities of an intriguing life in outer space. It's humor - espiecially during the time travel- adds a light touch to social conditions in the future. From royalty to the slave men (What an interesting idea..) this movie is a road map to how people will choose to evolve socially while we reahc higher standards as far as technology can carry us. Some day we may fight over such precious resources as water- but adventure and fantasy will always be around us. This movie is a classic 80's flick- a shoot-em-up with a sense of humor and wonder....more info
- Funny and twisted
I loved this movie when it came out in VHS and just had to have it when I found it here.
It is so funny, I laugh each time I see it....more info
- A good laugh without guilt.
It isn't Star Wars but, hey, it isn't pretending to be! It's pure fun with a great cast of lovable characters (Angelica Houston and Ron Pearlman, just to mention a few). The actors are having fun and you can't help but join them. This is a movie to watch with a group of friends - sit back and enjoy the ride. Science fiction at it's silliest but entertaining and endearing all the same. And who couldn't love the hilarious costumes the actors (and actresses) wear without shame. It's pure cheese and...you'll love every minute....more info
- Swashbucklers in outer space
Enjoyable and fast paced. Extremely funny in places with a touch of sexual banter. The actors are first rate and the story moves along at a good clip until the ending which is almost too silly to watch. Up to that point though it is very much worth watching. I plan to buy it....more info
- Space herpes? Damsel in distress? Pirates in tights?
This movie is a blast and funny. The costuming and set locations are awesome. The script is to die for. I recommend it if you like quirky humor, a story twist and something different than your regular scifi. Do I need to type space herpes again for you?...more info
- Jon Graham
Ice Pirates is basically space humor with a really good plot and not bad at all acting. The budget must have been a bit small but a good job was done on the end product over all. There is no doubt this is a classic that definately keeps you entertained. Probably why they play it on TV so much!...more info
- If You're Warped Enough...
You have to be a little warped, but this is a great old movie. Yes it's corny, and campy, and the special effects aren't great even for the time period, but you know what? It's still funny as heck. If you like Mel Brooks, or movies like Yellowbeard, Zorro: The Gay Blade, and/or Love At First Bite, then this is your kind of film....more info
- Every Sci-fi gimmick rolled into one fun flick!
This movie should be aired to every S-F class in college or hi-school. The Ice Pirates incorporates almost every Science Fiction theme imagionable. A MUST SEE for all S-F movie fans! Be sure to keep your tongue firmly in cheek!...more info